For the Record

Well, Sunday is officially my last day at costco for the summer season, I am considering returning for the winter season... During school though, my focus is on my studies.
My birthday is tomorrow... I keep telling myself im super stoked about it.. But the truth is im not really... I don't know why, but I feel soo silly organizing and paying for my own birthday.. I mean I want to celebrate and do something awesome... But I would totally rather just have friends that are ok with just hanging out, and having our own fun.. Instead of needing a plan.. Just for people to even want to come, this whole thing needs to be organized so people can feel comfortable with a set agenda... I guess im scared of knowing that most of my friends are just around for the fun of it the majority of the time.. That's why I can't just leave it up to fate.. But screw the cake this year, I don't think im going to be buying one of those things.
Enough of that rant.. On a more positive note, My best male friend is coming home soon, and I am soo excited about that!! Im going to pick him up at the airport.. I think im just happy to have him back, i miss him.. I like his company, and talking to him. Enough of that topic also.
Now, for the finale!! School starts on wednesday. Why should I be stoked for that? Well that is quite simple, indeed.... I feel like all summer my brain has been relatively close to mush. I haven't learn much of anything (besides some arabic) and because of that I have this inner most urge to just dive into some books. The smart little quiet girl in me seems to be emerging more and more. I'm excited for some quality library time, and getting another year of school under my belt. Im not soo excited for the people... that novelty wore alot a long time ago. But I am in that stage of my life where i am yearning for some company from my books.
Yay for school starting again!!!
And super yay for my best friend coming back to canada!!!

Another Day In the Life

One thing that I would think is great about being alone so often is the relief of having no conflicts in my life. I got a tad tangled up in new and old friends coming and visiting in town... that I was soo busy and having a blast, I didn't stop to think how it may make other people feel.. I didn't realise I had that much of an impact, and now that they are gone, and visiting time is over I have had the chance to sit down and breath... think about it... and truly agree in silence that seeing too many people is unnecessarily distracting. I love seeing my friends, but I very much dislike too much conflict and gossip.
Today was a fantastic day!! I finally received my dinette set with hutch... hehe, it's soo gorgeous! and not to forget I received my couches also :)
It was back to work for me today after spending a couple days in vancouver and seeing my family. Unce Sheldon came in from Singapore, Uncle Brad, Aunty Audrey, and Daniel came up from New York... I was able to finally see my Aunty Kerry whom I haven't seen in like eight years.. And spend time with my cousin Sam, we went shopping on Robson. Ate lunch at Moxie's and Dinner at Grama and Grampa's. It was just splendid, I was overly excited and releaved to finally have some family time for a change. Not to mention getting to see my mom again hehe.
On the way back I even got to visit my good friend Meryl in Chilliwack. We solidified our plans for my birthday, and now im even more stoked.. since it is only like a week away :D
Anyways, My blogging may be very random if at all, for I have no internet in my new house yet... so Anytime im around the university I shall try to remember. Goodnight to all.

The Color Of Freedom

I watched this movie the other week and It really got me thinking. About how things were in the past and how things are now... And in some ways life has changed drastically, yet in others nothing has seemed to sinch a bit to any progressive state.
This movie "The Color of Freedom" is a true story, told by Nelson Mendela's prison guard. Now if no one knows who this man is I can attempt a brief description of what I understand. He was an activist for freedom in South Africa, he wanted whites and blacks to live in harmony together. He was a strong leader, but he believed in peace and not violence. I admire this man.. This story was just amazing to me. You see the prison guard was of course a white man, and he started to befriend Mendela while he was watching after his section of the jail. He got in trouble for Mendela just to do little things for him.. like give a chocolate to his wife for him... This showed how some peope no matter how tough they seem, they can show compassion too... And he didn't care that other people thought his friendship with Mendela was wrong... because he knew it was right. And really, that is all that matters in the end... It is your decision to make the move... It is your life.. Live it with compassion.

Commitment.

This word strikes fear into many. And not just between people, for other things to. Committing to a job, schoolwork, a promise, a plan, even a blog. It is something that makes me wonder... why is there such a thing when no one can handle it? I mean, is there really someone who can commit themselves to anything and everything they try to??
Why does this frighten people so much?
I know I didn't keep committed to the blog because I have soo many other places to write my thoughts, that they have ended up everywhere... And who knows, maybe no one is reading it..
I brought out my writing book some months back, and converted to my old school ways of handwriting my thoughts on paper. I found it made me feel a lot better, but it just takes so much longer than typing.
There are many things that happen, that one can think about, but it is hard to decide if some of them are worth the brainpower.
Puzzling over others, I find has resulted in a waste of most of my time. I make friends, I lose friends... It's a never ending cycle. But some things I have been puzzling over are commitment, faith, truth, and interest. Like, why is it so hard to answer simple questions? Why are people afraid of the past? Why can't people live up to their word? If you make a plan, you keep it.. If you say you can and would like to hang out, then do it! It's a very simple concept in my head, but for some reason, most hold true to it.
Truth - Why are people afraid to say the truth? or hear it? ... I mean, it's spoken so highly of, and then noone follows through.. how does that even make sense??